Betting on football is a lot like living with a woman, there are always an incredible amount of rules you have to follow to make the experience pleasurable.
Rule no 1 in football betting is also rule no 1 in female cohabitation; avoid the Psycho.
Manchester City have always been a team to steer clear from on the weekly accumulator, occasionally magnificent, sometimes woeful but consistently inconsistent. Amazingly, Stuart Pearce has steered his team to an 11 match unbeaten run, and Man City at 8/13 are the weekend’s best bet. It’s Psycho logical.
The game of the week will be played at White Hart Lane, where Tottenham and Chelsea meet in a top of the table encounter. The Champions looked very impressive in midweek, and would appear to be an excellent investment at even money. Spurs have definite ability in their team, but I would advise the following; don’t get mad, get evens.
Here’s a stat that even a pre-therapy Joey Barton would find difficult to argue with, the last five matches between Middlesbrough and Charlton at the Riverside have ended in a draw. Boro won well in midweek, but Charlton’s unique policy of starting the season well before collapsing like Wayne Rooney’s deck-chair makes the draw a cracking bet at 12/5.
Alan Shearer’s personal plea to the referee not to send off Paul Konchesky has been hailed as an act of great sportsmanship, but I noticed his plea began after the West Ham man was on his way to the shower. Big Al goes up against old foe Roy Keane on Super Sunday, and Man U at 4/5 are the pick. The Reds have scored goals for fun at St James’ Park in recent years; they’ve netted an impressive eighteen goals in their last six visits. It could be another goal-fest, as well as a ‘Battle Roy Al’.
Robbie Savage will return to Villa Park for the first crypto gambling time since an eye-gouging incident involving Olof Mellberg. Now i’m no hippy, but if there is anything to the theory of karma, then Savage is a cracking bet at 16/1 to finally receive a sending off in a league match. Super Soccer make the hairy Welshman the favourite in a series of red card specials.
“Back to the caravan” – Robbie Savage to be sent off 16/1
“Duncan disorderly” – Ferguson to be sent off 20/1
“Over Keane” – Roy Keane to be sent off 20/1
“Dirty Vid” – Mark Viduka to be sent off 20/1
“Jerm warfare” – Pennant to be sent off 20/1
“Mak the knife” – Claude Makelele to be sent off 20/1
“Go, the whole hog” – Wayne Rooney to be sent off 20/1
“Walk like an Egyptian” – Mido to be sent off 25/1
“Red ‘Ed” – Edgar Davids to be sent off 25/1
“Barton, think” – Joey Barton to be sent off 25/1
“Miss the Boat” – George Boateng to be sent off 33/1
“Eidur down” – Gudjohnsen to be sent off 33/1
“Hard dazed Knight” – Zat Knight to be sent off 33/1
“Dirty Den” – Bergkamp to be sent off 33/1
“Raging Bull” – Jimmy Bullard to be sent off 40/1
“Dyer–bolical” – Kieran Dyer to be sent off 40/1
“Frank Butcher” – Lampard to be sent off 40/1
Quote of the week:
“What I had for my breakfast three weeks ago has no bearing on what I do today.”
Mick McCarthy shows a philosophical side.
Stat, you’re a liberty:
Charlton will not be relegated this season; no team has ever won their opening two games and gone on to be relegated from the Premiership.
Acc of the week:
The five fold pays over 30/1
West Brom v Birmingham Saturday 27th August 12.15 Live on Premiership Plus
West Brom 11/8
Get on: West Brom
Both teams were mullered in midweek, and the Albion are the more likely team to bounce back. It’s 10 matches on the road without a win for the Blues, plus they’ve never won at the Hawthorns in the Premiership. West Brom have it, in the Bagg.
West Brom to win 2-0 10/1
Aston Villa v Blackburn Saturday 27th August 15.00
Aston Villa 10/11
Get on: Draw
Blackburn have an excellent record at Villa Park, they’ve took maximum points on 6 of their last 11 visits, and can be confident of taking another point. There’s an interesting side issue here, it’s the Villans against the Villains, Olof Mellberg meets Robbie Savage; a true booking feast.
Milan Baros to score the first goal 5/1
Fulham v Everton Saturday 27th August 15.00
Get on: Fulham
Sorry Everton fans, all the omens point to a defeat at the Cottage. Your record in London is awful, and every time you’ve played Fulham in the Premiership, the home team have won the match. On the brighter side though, Liverpool are in the Champions League, even though they finished below you in the table, that’ll cheer you up.
Fulham to win 1-0 7/1
Man City v Portsmouth Saturday 27th August 15.00
Man City 8/13
Get on: Man City
Pompey are in real trouble. They struggled to earn a point at home to ten men in midweek, and they haven’t won a match in Manchester since 1963. As long as David James has managed to ‘prepare properly’ then City are nap of the week material.
Man City to score four or more goals 13/2
Tottenham v Chelsea Saturday 27th August 15.00
Get on: Chelsea
Chelsea are undefeated in the Premiership against their ‘title rivals’, and look to be an even money steal at White Hart Lane. It’s 13 wins from 15 games away from home for Jose’s men, the Evens looks bigger than Wayne Rooney’s Sunday dinner.
Lampard to score two or more goals 10/1
West Ham v Bolton Saturday 27th August 15.00
West Ham 5/4
Get on: Draw
The Hammers kit-man has emailed me to say that ‘Rio-Cocoa and Toddy Shearingham have looked sharp in training’. Bolton are unbeaten in three on the road, score draw.
Reo-Coker to score at any time 4/1
Wigan v Sunderland Saturday 27th August 15.00
Get on: Wigan
24 top flight matches without a win, they’re about to make it a pony.
Wigan to score in both halves 9/4
Middlesbrough v Charlton Sunday 28th August 13.30 Live on Sky
Get on: Draw
Mark Viduka and Darren Bent have both started the season superbly and can add to their tally in a score-draw. Who’s the value bet for the first goalscorer? Get Bent.
Darren Bent to score the first goal 7/1
Newcastle v Man Utd Sunday 28th August 16.00 Live on Sky
Man Utd 4/5
Get on: Man Utd
Eight of the last nine matches have produced three or more goals. There could be four in this one, all to the Manchester franchise.
Man Utd to win 4-0 33/1